Consume
by Sadarga
Summary: She isn't Dalish. She probably hasn't been for a while now. But the voices tell her this is good, and she's listening. A short, dark piece on what might have happened to Mahariel if Duncan hadn't found her. Rated T just to be safe.


**Disclaimer:** Dragon Age is not mine (damn shame), neither are it's awesome characters. This is just my expressing undying love for it.

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**Consume.**

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Only children acted so foolishly. _They_ laughed at her - she silenced them. Or at least she tried to.

That headache was getting worse.

When the unknown was upon you, running straight into it was just stupid. You waited until your whole clan was standing ready behind you. It was the only logical thing to do. The clan stood together, always and forever.

If she still had a clan to stand with that is. She could never go back to them now.

_They_ laughed again, their dark voices scraping at her ears and her soul. It was their fault she was here now - their fault for everything that had happened.

She wouldn't listen to them. They could laugh at her all they wanted to, but they wouldn't win. She wouldn't let them.

_Couldn't _let them.

Impatience was not something she was taught to have, yet eagerness and a lack of thought was what started all this trouble.

Stupid. Childish. Even more stupid. _They_ agreed with her.

They could have avoided the mirror, or even have just left before entering that room. Better yet; they could have just killed those foolish humans before they even spoke. Those trespassers. Humans. It's not as if there weren't enough of them ruining these lands.

Killing them would have been smart. Killing them would have been good. It would have felt good; her sharp daggers biting through the soft flesh, blood oozing into her mouth and onto her body, their screams filling her head and their human _meat _being left for her to-

The voices were laughing at her again. Their thoughts made her want to be sick. She _was _sick.

_Their _thoughts, not hers. _Theirs._ She would never do any of that. It was them who were telling her to. Or so she kept telling herself.

She couldn't listen. Couldn't. Thats what _They _wanted to happen. She wouldn't give them that satisfaction.

That headache was beginning to feel like a drum inside her head now, a drumming sound that was as erratic as the beating of her own heart. It was oddly nice to hear.

_They _laughed.

Why hadn't she just dragged herself and Tamlen back to the camp? _That _would have been the smart thing to do.

But no.

Like a child she ran straight into the ruins - and in doing so began the whole string of events that led her to now. And Tamlen was now paying for that impatience.

The voices told her that he was blessed as well.

But what she felt was no blessing - it was a curse. Pain, anger and guilt. No longer could she distinguish which one she felt. It was all just sorrow now. There was no happiness left in her, no hope or care. If she died right now then she wouldn't mind. She might even be happy.

How could she have been so careless? She deserved all the pain she felt now. It was her fault after all.

Dark whispers corrupted her, and even darker memories tortured every waking moment. She was a shadow of who she was before; hollow, empty and sinister. Even her once peaceful dreams were now tainted with visions of what she had caused. Of what she would become.

Could she hear singing?

The voices told her this was good, and it was becoming increasingly difficult not to listen to them.

Stupid. Foolish. Immature.

There was _definitely_ singing. Where though? Underground? She needed to find out.

Stupid. So very stupid. _They _agreed.

Why didn't she stop him? Why didn't she think about what could happen? Every action had a consequence - she knew that. Yet did she truly think that her actions would have no consequences? Foolish child, that's what she was.

How could she let this happen? She deserved to die.

But the singing stopped her. Its music shook her to the core, yet it called to her, tempted her. It was the first song she had heard since losing everything. It was beautiful, the only bright thing in her life now.

She didn't want to die - she needed to find it. The song. That beautiful song, which called to her even in her darkest hour. _They _wanted her to find it.

She wanted to find it. _Needed _to find it.

_They _laughed again, though this time she didn't silence them. They could show her the way to the song. And that was all she wanted right now.

A Dalish elf never betrayed her clan, yet that was exactly what she had done. She betrayed them all, and was doing so again now. Tamlen. Most of all Tamlen. Soon she would be as lost as he, even if her body still remained. Both of them were monsters now. Though the blame was only on her.

At least now she and Tamlen would be together again. The song would make sure of that. That's what it promised. _They _promised. And she was betraying her clan again to do it.

What kind of a Dalish was she? Without a home and without a clan? Who was she? A _Dalish_?

Part of her knew that she had not been Dalish for a while now.

The dark voices told her this was good though.

And this time - she listened.

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**Author's Note.**

**And now you all know how my mind is secretly dark and twisted. Just kidding (_sort of...)_**

**I don't know what to say...enjoy?**

**Hahaha? :-)?**


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